I'm in yet another improvised horror comedy this year...(and it's my last improv run in Philadelphia)


Teens on spring break, an old circus, a masked killer. Think you know where this is going? Think again! This Halloween, don’t spend your money seeing ANOTHER 80’s horror remake (ahem). See a show so shocking, so made-up-on-the-spot, that it will never be seen again. This film is not yet rated.

RUNS 10/18 THROUGH 10/31
Thursday 10/18 @ 8pm: https://goo.gl/ojDUAa
Friday, 10/19 @ 8pm: https://goo.gl/m5Kuxe
Saturday, 10/20 @ 8pm: https://goo.gl/Thrbik
Thursday, 10/25 @ 8pm: https://goo.gl/hfL89k
Friday, 10/26 @ 8pm: https://goo.gl/5kwPXL
Saturday, 10/27 @ 8pm: https://goo.gl/X2n9fH
Wednesday, 10/31 @ 8pm: https://goo.gl/M4rASF

Stay Dead Returns!

It's my favorite time of the year... Stay Dead!: An Improvised Horror Comedy is finally here for its 4th Halloween short-run.

Using classic horror film tropes and an audience suggestion, our cast creates a completely improvised horror comedy show live on stage. Monsters, haunted houses, demonic possession, axe murderers... it's all on the table in a show never seen before and, like many of the characters, never to be seen again! Everyone will die, but not everyone will STAY DEAD!

We have 10 shows over the next 2 weeks at PHIT Comedy, so check out our Facebook page for events and tickets!

stay dead cover photo.jpg

The Live Read Episode 2: LUNCHEONETTE by David Greenberg

September's The Live Read with Gab Bottoni show at PHIT Comedy was no joke, y'all. I was honored to live read a pilot written by my very first screenwriting professor, David Greenberg, called "LUNCHEONETTE:"



After her mother dies unexpectedly, driven, workaholic young businesswoman Maria De Luca inherits the South Philly sandwich shop that has been in her family for generations and suddenly has to choose between her blossoming career or keeping the place open — encountering obstacles from a variety of relatives, employees, customers and devious rival restauranteurs.

If you missed the show, you definitely missed something special. 

David Greenberg has over twenty years of professional screenwriting experience, nearly 50 screenplays, three produced feature films, two documentaries and countless shorts to his credit. He teaches screenwriting at Drexel University and The University of the Arts. In 2016, his first feature as writer-director "Stomping Ground" premiered at the Philadelphia Independent Film Festival and his short film "Interrogation" won a Special Jury Prize at the L.A. Neo-Noir Film Festival.


The Live Read w/ Gab Bottoni Episode 101

Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU to the phenominal writers who submitted their original 1/2 hour pilots to be read by myself and a fantastic cast of comedy cuties.

Thanks to Malaika Carpenter and Tarshara Baker for "DO BETTER," about best friends, Myesha and Tasha, who after getting dumped on the same day, make a pact to re-define happily ever after by discovering what truly makes them happy.

Thanks to Jack O'Keeffe for "HELLA FUN," about Kate, a young demon from Hell, who is banished to Earth and forced to dedicate her life to making one other person happy. Unfortunately, the person she's tasked with making happy – Helen – is about as miserable as they come.

Thanks to our wonderful cast!: Olivia Kram, Chris Berg, Scott Campbell, Sarah Clemency, Remi Dhillon, Chris Esperance, Erica Gooch, Will Harris Jr., and Randie Welles. 

And a very special thank you to the big, responsive, free-beer-lovin' audience that made this night as full and productive as it was. THANK YOU! Please get your butts in seats again for the next one! 


Catch Fjord at PHIT Before Our Run is Up!


Fjord is my 2.5 year old PHIT  Comedy House team ending it's run July 29th. Join us for our last 5 shows, or the Viking Funeral Series. 1 down, 4 to go. This weekend we head to the Del Close Marathon — our 3rd year performing at the festival and our first year at UCB Chelsea. Please come thru before we die!!!


The Live Read with Gab Bottoni Coming to PHIT Comedy on July 26th!

I'm so excited!! THE LIVE READ is happening on July 26th at PHIT Comedy! I caught up with PHIT's Artistic Director, Mike Marbach, to talk more about the inspiration behind starting a show where me and my funny buds read submitted orginal pilots in front of a live audience.

Graphic by Shannon Fahey.

Writers will get the real, honest reactions they need to write the best script possible. And the people who watch will get to see hilarious/talented comedians enact two funny, original narratives that they can follow from start to finish. It’ll be like watching an episode of a show they never heard of, with all the anxieties and in-the-moment-isms of it being a live show. Plus, free beer.
— Gab Bottoni

Please submit your 1/2 hour pilot scripts to me for #THE chance to have it #READ in front of a #LIVE audience by me and my funny buds!!

(submit to contact@phitcomedy.com w/ the subject line SCRIPTS FOR GAB)

Top 10 Things I Wish I Could've Tweeted While my Bio-Dad was Suing me

It's a beautiful (?) Sunday morning here in sunny (?) Philadelphia. My weather app says it's 82 and clear. I trust it. I'm not going outside. My first breakfast of peanut butter toast is doing its job in my belly, my coffee is still kind of warm enough to drink, and a shower is somewhere in the near, possibly foreseeable future. I don't know, this morning is fine I guess. Who cares. My biological father is suing me. 

Never in my life (besides the period between the start of puberty and right now in which I'm 90% of the time daydreaming about boners and boobs) has something so completely consumed me. Being an adult child of divorce isn't really a big deal anymore, right?  Even being an adult child of an alcoholic parent still leaves you in a pretty large pool of normal to moderately damaged millenials. But being an adult child of a sociopathic, manipulative monster of a dude who has tried for 22 long years in twisted ways to either completely own or totally emancipate you seems like a much more specific experience. If not, hit me up. Let's grab a beer, right?

Anyways, times are tough and weird, dude. I won't indulge in details, mostly because I can't, but the story has a happy-ish ending. As of September 19th, 2015, after spending hours and hours writing an affidavit that recounted all of the specific, awful, shitty details from my childhood regarding my monster, I am officially EMANCIPATED. No ties to the guy who's balls I used to halfway exist in. And most importantly, no looming court case to scare me into not tweeting about my experience while being sued by my biological father.

  1. Netflix and chill? more like Netflix and write an affidavit for the lawsuit ur bio-dad is filing against u amirite? lol

  2. that crazy moment when someone's zipper is open and u don't know if u should tell them and also ur bio-dad is suing u lol

  3. romeo and juliet except romeo is my bio-dad and he's filing a lawsuit against juliet and juliet is not a love interest its me. guys...my bio-dad is suing me.

  4. "don't count ur chickens b4 they hatch" AKA "don't think ur safe from being sued by ur bio-dad until ur emancipated from ur bio-dad who is definitely 100% suing u rn!!"

  5. if u can't handle me when my bio-dad is filing a law suit against me THEN U DON'T DESERVE ME AT MY BEST AKA WHEN MY BIO DAD IS NOT SUING ME

  6. u know what they say ;) the bigger the feet, the more likely ur bio-dad is gonna be suing u!!! ;) ;) ;) i'm a woman's size 11 :(

  7. look to ur right. now look to ur left. one of these people will die. the other is ur bio-dad and he is filing a law suit against u rn.

  8. roses are red, violets are blue, sorry ur bio-dad is still alive, and definitely still suing u :(

  9. "my bio-dad is suing me rn" ~ me, mid-sext

  10. drinkin' a bottle of my stepdad's homemade wine while reading the lawsuit m'bio dad has filed against me. U WIN SOME U LOSE SUM U KNOW?!?!?!*

*This tweet is a shoutout to my stepdad aka my REAL DAD, the guy who raised me and loves me. You're a cool ass dude, Papa. Thanks for being you.